Majority Rules: Realizing What Works

    The other day I had a new client to meet.  As I sat down in my office, I wondered what the person would be like and what obstacles they were facing. About five minutes later, a young man came into my office with a discouraged look on his face. After he sat down, I introduced myself. I asked him to tell me some things about himself. He then looked me square in the eye and said, " I just want you to help me." I was kind of taken by his impulsive response but decided to skip the small talk and move on. 
    I have systems that can help anyone, but I always try to find out some stuff about the person so I can better customize it to their certain situations. Well, as I started to go over some steps, I asked him if he wanted a piece of paper to take notes. He replied, "No."  I was already getting the feeling that he was not too excited about all of this. In the back of my head I was wondering why he even asked for my consultation. As I preceded to start telling him some things he could do to get started, he rolled his eyes and said, "That is what everybody says to do that I have talked to. That is not going to work." I paused and really had to think how to handle this one. He just kept giving me this more than anxious look.
     After thinking it through I asked, "So you have went to others for help?" He replied, " Yes, but they all tell me the same things you are telling me." I went for broke and asked, "Well, have you ever tried any of the things these people have told you?" He said, "No, because I know it is not going to work." I told him, "What have you got to lose by trying these things? I am trying to understand why you keep seeking help in hopes to hear something different than what you have heard before? Does it not occur to you these other people and myself might at least have part of your solution figured out already?" His expression changed. He looked as if he was processing what I said, and then displayed a look of disbelief.       
    He then told me no one has ever believed in him. That was why he was always fearful of trying new things. I am not sure how this will all pan out in the end,  but I know if he listens he will have his whole life changed. He left that day with a different look in his eyes and a new pep in his step.  He realized that day that he was not doubting the advice, or the person giving it, but he was doubting himself and his abilities all along.
    The lesson I took from this was: If I had given up on him from the first minute he contended with me, my efforts would have not been any better than anyone else's efforts. My efforts would have not been any better than the young man's previous efforts either. He had always quit before he got started. I am sure this young man has great potential, and together we will have to dig deep to find it. I think everyone has great potential, sometimes they just need that person to hold their hand to take them front and center so they can begin to let their light shine. Life is an exciting journey, and it is even more exciting when you can share yourself to help others along that journey. 

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